Blogging Tip#3 Dealing with the Dark Side of blogging.
Well in keeping with tradition I’m going to get right into some facts that you won’t see many other places.
Now I want to say that many of these”problems” happen in the real world and these are just a sign of the times I quess because they don’t make much sense to me.
Boomp3.com
Now the only reason I’m mentioning all this is to prove that the methods most people use online right now don’t work. You may be on the top of the world for a while.You may actually think your all that .You may even be all that but I have news for you. People see what you do or should I say don’t do.I have been going up the line of levels in blogging to see what people do to be successful and I can come up with different labels for various blogger types.Let’s just focus on the most common type and the one that is infeasted all across the internet. I will call them the ONE WAY BLOGGER it doesn’t matter if their new or an “old timer”. The main feature of the one way blogger is they “think” their way is the way to go.I can see the whole pattern.New guy on the scene becomes a high roller goes all out for self.6 months later where is that guy? CYA.
I would think it was me. Why are people like this now days? The one way blogger thinks about themselves and they want you to do stuff for them. They may hang around a second to see if any more fruit falls out of the tree. They may if your lucky, leave a comment, they may even feign friendship but when you “size up” any new friend and your just interested in people. You may soon realize that this is another one way blogger. They cheat themselves out of strong friendships .Many one way bloggers have been around long enough that if you go out of your way to say hello, they will actually ignore you.To me that doesn’t make any sense.The one way blogger doesn’t last in the end. I have seen countless abandoned and dead blogs. When you run out of gas your done.
Now the reason that I’m mentioned this is to encourage everyone to make an honest effort to be nice and less self centered. I would say I spend 50% of my time I’m either going by people I already know blogs and checking in or doing something for someone.
That has a very low response rate and I often wonder why I bother.See many people even close to me are one way bloggers and I just bite my tongue. Why point it out to everyone. I made a choice to not say something to someone today because soon I won’t have to worry about all this stuff. I got some very good news today and will be on the phone tomorrow sealing the deal;)
So back to encouraging some REAL connections.Take the time to really find the right people to associate with. I see people have 1000’s of “friends” online well I wouldn’t trade all of them for one good real friend.
I’m not speaking for just myself I read blogs that are well known and I see how ungrateful people are. Look the blogger is doing the best he can they don’t need you coming to just spout nonsense. I saw on one guys blog where he was legitimately just trying to help people .The responses were nasty, rude and I was really upset. I realized wow there’s alot of scumbags in this world.
I was going to call this post “playing the name game” Today I had the chance to talk on the phone with a high level blogger. I had his number and I wanted to ask him a question so I called. Before I did I almost expected him to be a “jerk” but I found he was very nice and we actually had a great conversation. I could feel that I had admiration for him because he has a big fan base and has been blogging successfully for many years.
Now what did that cost him? He is probably cool in real life so why not be online? I will now continue to go to his blog even more and this just reinforces to me that it is better to be nice. I try to focus on all the positive things as I prepare for the big show. I have been working on some video and trying to build my confidence by running my crazy rap on my poor wife:) NO I’m not selling anything on the videos;)
When my son goes back to school I will have a great place to do all the things that I want to do. I’m very excited what lies ahead for me. I see that all the HARD work will be coming to an end.I would of loved to have 50 great friends by now that would be joining me. I thought for the longest time it was me. I know people are busy and it’s easy to get distracted. I’m not asking you to be loyal to me. I will have plenty of people in my “online life” soon.
What I’m asking is for you all is to be more loyal to each other. I can go on someone’s blog and stumble,twit,submit it to mixx.com and searchles in 5 minutes. I enjoy doing it. It’s sad to see that there’s alot of people that don’t even take a second to do the right thing. Hey it just makes me stronger.
I’m sorry to mention this but I see it on people’s blogs that are really tying to do their best and they have no comments or many visitors.I feel bad for them. I don’t even know them but I click whatever I can to help them.The only way we are going to make it is to work with each other NOT against each other.
THANKS
Like the old saying goes,You didn’t play me you played YOURSELF
Work with each other not against each other
Stumble It!
Tags: blogging tips, do follow bloggers, do follow blogs, MY DO FOLLOW EMPIRE
Stumble It!
August 19th, 2008 at 10:41 am
John! Glad you got some good news. Keep up the good work. I am starting to see your site everywhere. You are an inspiration. I just wish i had more time on here. I homeschool my 3 kids, so i get to pop in and out on the interweb now. Thanks for your friendship, bro.
Tony
http://www.imablogger.net
Where False Doctrine Gets PWND
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August 19th, 2008 at 1:41 pm
Your attitude and frankness is refreshing. You are one those bloggers that is truly helpful and respectful of others. Thanks for visiting my site, I really appreciate it.
You are right, we have to search out true blogging relationships. We all have so much to learn from each other.
Keep up the great work and I will drop by again soon.
goofblogger makes money onlines last blog post..When Should You Hire to Someone to Write Content
August 19th, 2008 at 8:30 pm
John, very inspiring post! You have always gone out of your way to help other bloggers. I think some people just don’t get that. I am afraid I could be guilty of not doing enough sometimes but I sure do try.
Good luck with your new venture. I would love to hear about it and hope it turns out to be all you want and more! Take care.
Kellys last blog post..What Do Bloggers And The Grateful Dead Have In Common?
August 19th, 2008 at 8:33 pm
very good read. nice post!
August 19th, 2008 at 8:38 pm
At social media sites the first question is “Why don’t I get visitors?”
Answer: Do you visit others?
Same with comments. Your “one way blogger” describes so many of those who are struggling.
Joes last blog post..You May have Noticed
August 19th, 2008 at 8:44 pm
John, this is a wonderful post! I am very impressed by your sincerity - it definitely comes through in your writing. I am new to blogging and love writing. I have experienced some of the nastiness and selfishness that you speak of and honestly, even though it is in the cyber-world (not like I know them personally), it has hurt my feelings…I’m too tender hearted, I guess. Anyways, I really enjoyed reading your post and will check back often!
Blog by Donnas last blog post..Why Should We Pay Extra For 3D Glasses… Every Time
August 19th, 2008 at 9:40 pm
Hey man,
I found this blog on Digg. (you can thank your friend Kell for that).
I have to say I agree with you on every level. I myself have only been blogging for a year and launched my current site in March (and then retitled/branded in May). I’ve been approached by a lot of the types you’ve described in this post but I’ve also realized the high importance to be placed on the growing need for a community among bloggers. We really do need to help each other out and you’re right, it doesn’t take long to digg, share, stumble, or even click on ads (whether you want to buy or not) just to help someone out.
I’ve also learned the more you give to other bloggers the more they want to help because they know your labor of love and how hard it can be in a world full of blogs.
Thanks for this post. Very refreshing and I’ll do my best to come around here as often as possible.
JB@TheLaunchingPad
JBs last blog post..Hello, Old Friend
August 20th, 2008 at 2:43 am
I try to do much more for others than I do for myself. Doing it alone gets me nowhere really, but when I take the focus off of me and put it on my testers, they become interested in my testable model, and begin to feel the same excitement that I do. That is where my success lay. If I lift EVERYONE to the top, maybe one of the ones on the way up might extend a hand down and give me a little boost up to follow behind them. But if they don’t then at least I succeeded by getting others up the ladder.
It sounds silly, but if you take 4:20 for example, the group of folks hanging out at that particular point in time are having more fun as a group or circle of friends, then they would be if they were all alone staring at the clock wondering what others were doing at that exact minute. 
THIS IS JOHN SULLIVAN editing this comment
http://www.linkbackproject.com
http://www.searchles.com/groups/show/Bloggers
http://www.mixx.com/stories/1866446/_the_linkback_project_p1_s1_the_link_back_project?vote=1
http://friendfeed.com/potpolitics
http://pownce.com/jsinkeywest/
August 20th, 2008 at 2:49 am
@The Linkback Project: Guy I always know when 420 is
Plus I know how to fill your comment box up with do follow
right back to you and your site so let me edit your box and
I hope we can team up one on one more often.I read alot of
your writing on your Christian based,personal site and I knew
from day one you were my kind of people
Thanks and I hope your on the mean and ready to kick some ASS;)
hey Brother I would switch that permalink structure it’s easy and a powerful move;)
Link ‘http://www.linkbackproject.com/?p=181′ successfully saved for you
see that p=181 that is weak for seo change it to date and title .Plus it looks better
on the front pages of google like mine do;)
August 20th, 2008 at 3:55 am
Ok John. Permalinks changed as soon as I saw it in your reply. Excellent idea, much thanx, every little tweek counts, and that one was more than just a little!
As for your comment box addition, I can see the method in your madness, but it is not quite as clear as it would be if you explained the secrets to the mechanics. 
Feel free to contact me outside of the public eyes if you ever want to share your methodology. I think if I am understanding it right, I might be able to add a twist to it that could make it better? Just a guess from my guess at your little magical find there.
Or maybe I know nothing, I am a bad guesser, and should just take the link love and be happy. Either way, I am content with being happy. LOL
Thank You again John…
August 20th, 2008 at 7:19 am
I found you on digg from a shout ! Love the honesty and putting it out there as well as many others seem too. I started blogging over a year ago, and had lots of questions. Some were answered nicely, some where answered not so nicely. How do we learn if we do not ask?
I did alot of reading, I enjoy visiting and commenting others blogs and finding out about people all over the world. Isn’t that what “networking” is all about. I love finding out where people visit me from, and in turn go visit those sites, you never know what you will find at the other end.
Susies last blog post..Moonlight,a tropical beach..and….Blue Bi-you?
August 20th, 2008 at 3:40 pm
Awesome post! I read your search engine post and then read this one. You have a different style, but I found it very interesting and it seems to be working well. I have come across the “one way blogger” a lot in my short blogging career. I have also come across bloggers I respect very much and consider to be some of the best people I have never met. Check out http://www.thebobofiles.com , for one example. Thanks for coming by my blog Web Money and commenting. I also checked out BLOGANESE and will be back to both.
Added to my blogroll!
Blakes last blog post..ATV and OHV Trails in South Carolina
August 22nd, 2008 at 7:51 pm
Am pretty new to scene and write about my knowledge base which is property. Had to comeback and write a little as you are certainly true to your word and had popped over to my modest site. Thanks
There are too many people out there just for ME, ME, ME and its good to see you practice what you preach, thanks again!!!
HIPs last blog post..Property Information Questionnaire (P.I.Q.)